Handling problems that happen between yourself and another person can be difficult. Even with the most clearly outlined steps for solving problems, we can still have clouded judgment due to our personal interpretation of how something is occurring. You may have learned from experience that ignoring a situation will not make it go away. Fortunately, there are tips you can refer to if you are trying to solve a conflict.
Tips for Resolving Problems
Identify exactly what the problem is and why it is bothering you. Getting clarity on a situation will help you deal directly with the issue and prevent it from becoming bigger than it needs to be.
Who does the situation involve? There is no doubt that sometimes we need to talk about a conflict in order to work through issues. If you need to work something out before confronting someone directly, make sure you talk to a person you trust and ask yourself what you hope to accomplish by engaging in the conversation. Sometimes we trick ourselves into thinking we are talking about a person or issue because we want to work through it, when in reality we are engaging in gossip.
Wait until you are not feeling an intense emotion. When we act out of anger or sadness, it is very difficult to have a constructive conversation about how to mend a troubling situation.
Be prepared to listen. Remember that listening skills are just as important as the ability to express yourself. If you are having a conflict with someone, they likely have an opinion about the situation that will be different from your own. Be ready to hear what you might have done to contribute to the situation.
Put yourself in someone else’s shoes. Try to think of how you influenced a situation positively or negatively. You may view yourself as a victim, but there is a chance that the other person might also feel victimized.
Take some time to establish how the situation could be mended. It might be easier to solve a conflict if you have reflected on what you would rather be experiencing.
Conflict is a part of life, and it can be a great opportunity to learn about ourselves and others if we employ good resolution skills. This list is not exclusive and every situation is different, but if you take some time to consider the points made above there is a good chance that you will grow in your communication and problem solving abilities.